Yeehaw!

In Dallas. Back to doing Yahoo stuff. This week is a little more relaxed, 1 training slot on two out of 3 days...so just two trainings total instead of 3 a day.

Today, after training, I went out with my camera to fins cows or horses. It actually wasn't long until I found an Equestrian Club. Took some fun pics that I can't put up until I get home.

Now if you'll excuse me, the Lost finale is starting.

Did we really like this stuff?

Right now I'm watching "Top Secret" on HBO Family. Maybe I've been doing improv so long that campy bits are lost on me now, but this movie is ridiculous, and I remember loving it when I was younger.

It's like a terrible pun every 2 minutes. It reminds me of Mel Brooks' any movie.

I never saw "Blazing Saddles" when I was younger, but everyone speaks of it's hilarity, and I did a VO that changed the words of a scene in that movie. I then bought the DVD of this hilarious gem. I then watched it.

It is a different era, friends. The humor in it is very punny/HA HEY! And a lot of it is racist.

Speaking of HA HEY! Val Kilmer in Top Secret was at a play and had to hide. He went into the "Prop Room"...once inside it was full of PROPELLERS!!! HA HEY!

Was it a simpler time? Are movies that are currently out as stupid, but in a different way?

Around the world...

...in one buffet!

This week I'm in lovely St. Louis. I drove to see the St. Louis Arch...done.

So...what else is there to do in St. Louis? Apparently smoke. Other than that I decided to go to Harrah's Casino. You'll be happy to know my fame and fortune automatically boosted me to the Gold level. So that was cool. You're required to get a points card before you go into the casino. Apparently it helps keep track of the people. There is a law that you can only gamble (lose) $500 every 2 hours.

When I got my gold card I also got a free ticket for the buffet...which was great because I hadn't eatten yet. I got there around 7pm and looked for my game....Let It Ride. I found something similar called something like Texas Hold'em Style. You ante in with $3-$50, you also have the option to play the bonus. The bonus is a $1-$25 bet and you win based on your first two cards. You are dealt 2 cards only, and if they are any pair, or some combo of Ace & Jack or higher, you win based on your bonus bet.

Once you see your two cards you then either bet double your ante ($6-$100) to see the flop of three cards that everyone gets to use, or you fold. The dealer will then deal a fourth card and a fifth. You get a chance to match your ante before each of those cards are drawn. Then it is your hand vs the dealer's hand. My very first hand I bet $3, and then $1 on the bonus. I was dealt two Aces, which is great. The dealer ended up winning the had with three of a kind, but he gave me $30. I didn't get it. It was because I played the bonus! And getting Two Aces pays the highest bonus odds, 30-1. Well...this game I liked.

I played for 2 hours and ended up being close to even when I was ready to go to the buffet. On a whim I bet $5 on the bonus for my last hand. I was dealt an Ace King, which paid out 15-1...so I won $75 on that bonus even though I lost the hand.

Then I was off to the previously hinted buffet. I had food from the four corners of the world: Crab Rangoon, Pizza, Chicken-fried steak, and salad.

You know you're in a good casino when they have a cigarette vending machine, AND every restroom has a convient disposal for insulin syringes! FUN!

Back on the Road

Same company, different training. This time I'm in Detroit, MI.

I get the strange feeling you're asking yourself, "But Rance, what do you on the road?"

It is pretty simple and usually involves TV. I like to go out and explore if I have a day free, but I don't...and these trainings can be draining. So, my week usually includes watching shows I don't normally watch on TV...like Amazing Race, Wheel of Fortune, and last night...Myth Busters.

Since I'm doing 5 trainings a day, I get home around 6:00 and I'm tired of standing so I order food or get food and then TV! Kind of boring.

Hmm.

Today while waiting for my Honey BBQ Steak to go from Chili's I went across the street to Comp USA. While killing time there I found Microsoft Streets & Trips 2006 with GPS Locator. WITH GPS LOCATOR!!!

Add to that there was a $40 rebate and you have awesome.

I have a laptop that is now a GPS locator with voice driving directions. I just tried it out and it works. It will be extra handy for any future gigs, and for when Deanna and I drive to Maine this Summer.

Thank you, technology.

Farewell DSL / Rumor Has It...

I finished my last training job yesterday. I'll be back training on a different topic later on in the month, but this leg is done.

I was in Alhambra, CA near L.A. for most of the week, and then Sacramento on Friday.

Upon returning to the airport to fly home I noticed everyone looking out the window. Human nature kicked in and I followed them to see what was up. Right there on the runway was Air Force One...and just 5 days after I had seen it blown out of the air on 24 (season 4 disc 4...oh yeah...SPOILER).

It was far enough away that I couldn't see if the President was there. I know he was flying in to meet with the Governator.

I then flew to Denver, then to Chicago.

On the flight from Denver to Chicago there were a couple things.

1) one of the flight attendants HAD TO BE in witness protection. A stout, older guy...totally looked like he could have been ex-mob and now was a flight attendant. It was bizarre.

2) I saw the movie "Rumor Has It..." with Jennifer Aniston and Kevin Costner. Rumor Has It...that Jennifer Aniston can't act that well. She did ok, but anytime she was supposed to hysterically cry I found myself thinking "I could do better than that if I were playing the female role...I would be more believable." Another thing about this movie. The guy playing her fiancee (no idea what his name is)...this guy has popped up recently and pretty much plays the same roles all the time. I've seen him in two different movies on airplanes...both as the straight man love interest. I don't remember what the first movie was. He was also the straight man love interest in that movie where what's-her-name from Walk the Line is a ghost. I can't believe I can't think of her name...Legally Blonde...that girl. Anyway, I'm sure Eric or Rich will know the name of her, and the guy I'm talking about. So this guy. He seems to be in everything in this role, he's good at the role, but just not that interesting. He was also...uh boy....I'm blanking on names...he was in that movie with Tom Cruise (bad guy) and Jamie Foxx (cab driver). All I can think of is Minority Report...and it's not that. Anyway, the guy I'm talking about is a cop/detective that is trying to catch Tom. That's the only place I've seen him NOT as the love interest.

Man...I think I just found something hereditary that I got from my dad...inability to remember movie names and actor names. And if it IS hereditary, it will only get worse from here. My favorite movie name guess of my dad's: "Stench of a Woman" instead of "Scent of a Woman".

Back in Action

Well...I had a week off. Stayed home and took some headshots, AND had a fun easter celebration!!

That's right...bunnies and bees!

The day after easter I flew to my current location...Alhambra, CA. Things have been low key this time around. One of the bonuses of flying is that someone is always sick...always. I'm feeling it a little, but fighting it off.

My flight was potentially terrible, and then got better. I was standing behind a lady who was about 5'4". As we slowly made our way to our seats on this full flight, she went to an aisle seat in the emergency row...5'4"!!! If you're short and you sit in the emergency row, Karma will get you (PS. my new name is Karma).

I, and my long legs, had a window seat. My last two flight have blessed me with aisle seats (so I can pop my knee...those who know me, know)...but they were next to an old man with a newspaper. TWO FLIGHTS! DIFFERENT OLD MEN! Why do I mention the paper? Because it would drift over onto me, as well as old man elbows. At least I was in the aisle and could easily escape.

As I took my window seat I waited to see if my old man fate would reach me. Nope...a baby! A cute adorable baby..well...1-2 year old. She sat right there in the middle seat as her mom sat in the aisle and her huge, muscular dad put things in the overhead. I'm thinking "GREAT! This is the best! I won't be fighting for the arm rest or leg space with this little kid in the seat!" And then, her huge dad sits in the middle seat. Ugh.

I had been Pepsi-ing up and used the bathroom. When I came back he offered to have me sit in the aisle and everything was good and well. Whew! That was a close one!

I got to see the Chronicles of Narnia finally. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe is an animated film that I remember very well from my childhood. I almost started crying when Aslan made his "agreement" just because that little kid part of me remembered what happen and I felt like a little kid again. It wasn't that bad when they finally got back to it. Glad to finally see it.

I've been meaning to get out to IO West while I'm here, but being slightly sick has made me do nothing more than watch TV and go find food. I got 10 hours of sleep last night...which is VERY odd for me considering I woke up at 7:00am.

In other news. I got an interesting message on my MySpace page. It was from someone named simply, Kim. Turns out Kim is the Kim who is the sister of my old friend Aaron. I've been friends with Aaron since at least the 9th grade...maybe 8th...definitely not 7th. Aaron and Blaine were my friends from that era, and the only ones I really hung out with after High School. I ended up working with Blaine at the job I had before moving to Chicago (I was there for 5 years, he's still there) and still hung out with Aaron.

One day, and I don't really remember when, but I feel like it was before 1996...definitely before 1999. He just left. He didn't say anything to Blaine or I. He was just gone. We never heard from him. At my 10 year reuninon I bumped into some guys he hung out with that I also knew (I guess they were kind of friends) and they had seen him time to time, but he was always on the go, and usually burning bridges.

Well, Kim sends a message saying "how's it going" and gives me Aaron's phone number. He's living in Phoenix. I called him and got voicemail. It's weird to have a friend from childhood and later just disappear. So, it's good to know he's still alive.

Of Blasting and Stupidity

As promised...your's truly, destroying the evil Zorg.

Something that has been bugging me lately is the general stupidity of the population. In specific...ignorance...I think.

Here's what I'm talking about. I'm in at least two airports twice a week when I'm on these gigs. If the airport has a moving walkway, there is a voice saying "Caution, you are about to get on a moving walkway" at the beginning and "Caution, the moving walkway is ending" at the end.

Are we that dumb? C'mon people. Use your brains. You see a part of the floor is moving. If you pay attention, then you'll do just fine. But there are the idiots out there (case in point, grandmother on AFV who is standing backwards on the walkway and smiling at the camera, and then the walkway ends and she falls over) who don't. And quite possibly, these same idiot take it to court to be rewarded for their stupidity. I can only imagine that is the case or the airports and other businesses with other warnings would go to all the trouble to put obvious warnings on things.

If you can't tell that a toy that has small parts could be a choking hazzard for your one year old, you don't deserve to be a parent. You failed...failer.

This kind of ties into my trainings I've been doing. One of the first things they do is fill out a little form with some info for a fun activity. This week, hardly anyone brought a pen. I ask "do you have a pen?" and the reply is "nobody told me I would need a pen." Time to make some assumptions, America. I'm going to go somewhere to learn...I might need to write something.

So, there. Stupidity. Stupidity and indecisiveness drive me crazy. I may do some stupid things sometimes, but I'm decisive and informed when I do it.

The Happiest Place on Earth!

I'm still in Tustin, and 7-10 miles away from Disneyland. DL is open until 11pm...I get done with training at 4:30.

Today I braved traffic and went to Disneyland. A lot of changes since I went in 97-98...like California Adventures where a parking lot used to be. It took me a while to find the actual parking lot. Once I did the rest was easy. I'm all by myself here in Tustin and I was all by myself in Disneyland. I got there around 5:00 or so.

First place I went was Indian Jones!!! This ride is my favorite, and it still is. I was sending pics to Joey, Tara, Rich and Deanna as I went. This ride is even better when the wait is 15 minutes. This is the perfect time of year to go to Disneyland.

From there I was going to try a ride I hadn't been on before, but I saw Star Tours and the sign said the wait was 5 minutes. On either side of me was a parent with a small child. The dad to the left of me was trying to tell his kid:

Dad: "now, this is going to have a movie screen that will show a movie. It will seem like we're going into space, but we aren't really. The room will move too..."

The kid was fine the whole time, but the dad kept checking in through the whole thing.

From there I went to Astro Rangers? The Buzz Lightyear ride with lazer tag. This was fun. You get scores and a picture. I'll put the pic up here if I remember.

Next was space mountain. High speed roller coaster in the dark, fantastic. I was laughing hard by the end of it. So fun! WITH HARDLY ANY LINES!

Then it was time to ride the Matterhorn...for Prouty! I called Prouty and had him on the phone for the ride, so that was kind of fun and ridiculous.

Then I hit Small World. Creepy as ever. This is where it dawned on me that this place isn't as fun by yourself.

There was some parade. A typical one.

I ate a $9 crappy burger and went to Thunder Mt. Railroad...another great. From there it was back to Indy Jones and Buzz. The fireworks display was cancelled, and I was ready to leave.

It was fun...but I wish you were there.

Tustin Cologne, Tustin Fits

I'm in Tustin, CA this week...a.k.a. Santa Ana. It's weird being here after living in Chicago. I can drive for 10 miles in any direction here and go through at least three cities. Chicago is huge, these places are small.

While in the O'Hare Airport on Monday I saw...DITKA! He was on one of those carts that take people to their gates. I was heading to get food and didn't realize it fully until the cart had gone by, otherwise I would have hopped on and snapped a photo.

I'm very close to Disneyland here. I hope I make it out there sometime. The traffic is TERRIBLE when I get done doing training. It will probably take an hour to make the 10 mile drive. Add to that it was raining today. But I think I'll still go. They are open until 11:00pm, so I'll get in 5 hours. Figure I'll hit the new things that I haven't been on since I was there last (97-98ish).

SPEAKING OF CREEPY!...Kenny Rogers is on American Idol right now as the guest "star" who goes over songs with each singer. He...is...BOTOX'd! He and Barry Manilow are cree-py looking.

Hi-ho the derry-o. Spring is finally here.

Tomorrow morning I will be dressing up as a bumble bee. If you know me, you know I've also been: Willy Wonka, Prince Charming, a farmer, and a reindeer. Tomorrow...a bumble bee. I'll be hanging out with a Pixie and the Easter Bunny.

How else do I know Spring is here? ANTS!

I hate ants! HATE!

If you ever want me to destroy another human, cover them in ants. Ants trigger something in me that instantly says "destroy". Thank you, RAID. Although your "Kills on Contact" spray is lacking a little as I watch ants walk around after they're sprayed.

Also Deanna has killed 4 spiders this week. The bugs they are a-thawing.

Bakersfield!

What a time to be in Bakersfield! Here is what happened of note while I was out there:

Country-
As all of you know. Bakersfield is (was) home to Buck Owens...of "Hee-Haw" and country music fame. I drove on Buck Owens Blvd. He has this country music museum, restaurant, and I think a sizeable concert space out there. It's big time.

Well, he died last Friday night. In his sleep after performing. I happened to catch a little special on TV about him. He created this country music museum...had these bronze statues made of country greats like Johnny Cash, Garth Brooks, Merle Haggard (or something like that), and others (including himself). When the statues were unvealed the people who were portrayed in bronze (who were still alive) were there. And Garth Brooks PROPOSED TO TRISHA YEARWOOD RIGHT THEN AND THERE IN FRONT OF EVERYONE!!! (I don't follow country music at all).

I found out from the Manager of the place I was doing my trainings that tomorrow (Saturday) is the funeral and they are supposedly closing the freeway that took me from my hotel to the airport. So I got out of there just in time. Farewell, Buck Owens. It seems just yesterday you were here. Once I finally made it to Bakersfield, plbbbt!, You were gone.

An Actual Country-
California is a state that is right above Mexico (the more you knooooowwwwww). Apparently there is some legislation coming up that has Mexican teens in an uproar. The legislation is supposed to crack down on illegal immigrants. There were two school walk out protests while I was here. All Jr. High-High school students waving Mexico's flag. Lots of news footage of teens talking about how Mexicans come over and do the jobs no one wants to do. The pressure is slowly building and there is another scheduled walk out for 4/10 (JOIN UP!). While I was driving from my last training to the airport I saw a white guy sitting on a wall with an american flag. Two Mexican youths were walking by and yelling at him. One of them spit on him and he just calmly picked up his phone. A couple white people popped up on the other side of the wall and yelled at the mexican teens. One of the teens threw a punch. Then the two teens made their way across the 6 lane road (not a freeway or highway...just a CA road). There were already a lot of Police driving around the area, and it wasn't long before the teens started running and two cop cars were heading there direction.

My take? Unless you're a Native American, you're pretty much an immigrant. Settle down everybody!

F this S-
I flew from Bakersfield to Phoenix, and now I am here in Phoenix. My flight was supposed to leave at 10:30pm and arrive in Chicago at 2:49am. My flight is delayed until 11:20.

I managed to get to California Pizza Kitchen right before they and every other food place closed for the night. I sat next to a table that had a mother and a son. The son was about 11 or 12. They were having a very cordial conversation that went a little something like this:

Mom: (all said in a pleasant voice)You're really just saying those thing to rebel. It really isn't nice to say S or D.

Son: I know. It just comes out sometimes....my teacher says D.

Mom: Really? When?

Son: Like "Oh I forgot to grade you D reports!"

Mom: Laughing Well...D isn't as bad as S or others, unless you are using it with his heavenly father's name...that is VERY bad. You should never do that.

Son: What do you mean?

Mom: GD.

Son: Oh. [some name] says [something I couldn't hear] but it's ok because of her beliefs.

Mom: She believes in God. But you're right. She can say what she wants. (long pause) Ben doesn't say GD does he?

Son: Sometimes.

Mom: (pause) Well he knows better than that.

It was a wonderful conversation filled with letters.


What will happen on my adventures next week? Stay tuned and find out!

Delicious Goodness

This week I'm in lovely Bakersfield, CA. Nothing too cool of note here as of yet...except for...CARL'S JR.!!!!

Not long before I moved to Chicago I discovered the Carl's Jr. Western Burger. This is a greasy burger with cheese, bacon, BBQ sauce, and onion rings INSIDE the bun! I also put fries in the bun as well.

In Oregon the fries were terrible. I would put them in the burger because that was the only way to tollerate them.

Here...the fries are great! It is delicious and gross at the same time. I can't stop going there.

Unexpected Hilarity

So, I'm sitting here in the Wichita, KS airport (ICT) watching season 4 of 24 on my laptop.

I am pretty done seeing everything there is in Wichita so I got to the airport super early. I'm on disc 2 of 6...I watched the first episode on the disc and started the second.

Every episode of 24 starts with "previously on 24" and then there is a recap. Since I just watched the prior episode I clicked on fast forward.

The difference between my laptop and my DVD player at home? The laptop plays sound as it fast forwards. It is...HILARIOUS! If you've ever seen those bunny shorts (I think it's actually bunnyshorts.com), it's like that. People delivering dramatic lines at break neck pace.

If you have a DVD player that plays FFWD with sound...try it out. It's great!

Wichita, KS

I've been in Wichita, KS since Monday. I leave tomorrow (Friday). There really isn't a lot to do here.

Luckily I have a rental car, and I caught a cold on the plane. So I mostly hang out in my hotel room or drive around looking for a new place to eat.

There is a freak winter storm (in spring) that is hitting a huge area. It snowed last night and will be cold tonight (for Wichita).

I finally got to eat at a Sonic. Molly is in tons of commercials for Sonic, and they play on cable everywhere. I've seen them in Chicago, I've seen them in Portland. But there are no "Sonic" restaurants in those areas. So, I ate there two nights ago. Pretty good.

Last night I decided to try out a place called Spangles. Fast food with the slogan "It Just Tastes Better." THAT'S A LIE! Their food was crap! DON'T EAT AT SPANGLERS! GROSS!

I've been doing these corporate trainings for a major communications company. They're pretty good. I'm doing two a day this week and 3 a day for three more weeks in other cities. Luckily there are some breaks for fun stuff, but I'm pretty into the product and don't mind upselling it.

I'd rather not be sick though.

Ahhhh, airline travel. Tomorrow I get my chance to pay it forward to some other non-ill passenger.

Wichita, KS

I've been in Wichita, KS since Monday. I leave tomorrow (Friday). There really isn't a lot to do here.

Luckily I have a rental car, and I caught a cold on the plane. So I mostly hang out in my hotel room or drive around looking for a new place to eat.

There is a freak winter storm (in spring) that is hitting a huge area. It snowed last night and will be cold tonight (for Wichita).

I finally got to eat at a Sonic. Molly is in tons of commercials for Sonic, and they play on cable everywhere. I've seen them in Chicago, I've seen them in Portland. But there are no "Sonic" restaurants in those areas. So, I ate there two nights ago. Pretty good.

Last night I decided to try out a place called Spangles. Fast food with the slogan "It Just Tastes Better." THAT'S A LIE! Their food was crap! DON'T EAT AT SPANGLERS! GROSS!

I've been doing these corporate trainings for a major communications company. They're pretty good. I'm doing two a day this week and 3 a day for three more weeks in other cities. Luckily there are some breaks for fun stuff, but I'm pretty into the product and don't mind upselling it.

I'd rather not be sick though.

Ahhhh, airline travel. Tomorrow I get my chance to pay it forward to some other non-ill passenger.

Ramping Up Again

Well...I'm sure I'll be posting more stuff soon that is boring to people in Chicago, but interesting to my family and maybe Declan.

I've got another gig coming up where I'll be out of town for 20 days in March and April. 20. Twenty. And only four cities this time...one in Kansas and three in California...I think.

On a different note. If you haven't seen an episode of "24", you should watch that show. I never seem to listen to hype about shows, and then by the time I realize "maybe this IS a good show" I'm so far behind that it makes no sense to start watching. That's where this awesome new trend in TV Shows being released on DVD comes in...mixed with a little "Netflix" goodness.

There are currently 5 seasons of 24. The currently airing season is 5. I'm up to date on that season and I just finished watching season three. This is good stuff. They kill off main characters...MAIN CHARACTERS! It is great. The only thing I haven't liked so far is that (AND THIS WILL BE A MINOR SEASON THREE SPOILER) Jack Bauer (the main character...Keifer Sutherland) is supposedly addicted to heroin because of undercover work. He is feeling the effects of it in the first episode, and it's a part of the first five or so, then that story line just sort of disappears. And the ending was a little predictable at times in three...but still good.

That being said, that is pretty much all that is wrong with it. I love to hate the character Shari Palmer. Great! She makes me so angry! Great actress in my book...I hope the actress isn't like her character in real life.

The only downfall to watching season five while catching up is that sometimes there are people who's lives are in jeopardy, but I know they'll be fine because I've seen them in season five. But not everyone survives. I don't recommend doing what I did for the first episode of season five alone...major stuff.

Go to netflix and start watching...all you need to do is watch 96 hours of the show until you get to watch the current 24 hours of this season. You've got time.

Oh! And we're going back to Maine...I think...in September/October this time.

PS. don't read the comments if you don't want to see Declan's 24 Season 5 spoilers

Power Weekend

I don't think I've really talked about improv in a while.

I had a power weekend this time around. Friday started off with a Johnny Roast Beef show at I.O. and something was amiss with the electrical system. It was the last show for the first group. Right after their opening the lights went out. Everything was dead in the control room. It ended up being that a breaker got triggered, but this team was left to do their last show in the dark...until they came on...and until someone went back to see what the problem was by turning on the computer and tripping the breaker again. That team got the lights blown three times. We followed their show and had zero light problems...go figure. We had a great show. Big time fun. Katie Nahnsen, ladies and gentlemen...keep that name in your brains. She's funny and will go places. Emily is funny too, but she's too comfortable in her day job to take the risk of low paying opportunities.

I went straight from their to reffing at CSz. The longest show I've reffed in a while. Just a weird coincidental show where not a single game we played was short.

Saturday meant two CSz shows...reffing, then sound. Yep...3 CSz shows and I didn't play in a single one. The show I reffed was phenomenal. I told everyone before the audience even started coming in that I smelled a good show. I was getting suggestions for 5 things and this kid, who had given me plenty of suggestions, gave me "Liquid Nitrogen." I took "mud" instead, but told him if Molly said "Liquid Nitrogen" I would give him a dollar. 5 things ends and I'm telling the audience what their half-time options are when Molly stands up and says "Ref Rance? I have an announcement...Liquid Nitrogen." During the second half I gave that kid a dollar.

Tonight (Sunday) was a partial surprise. Rich text messaged me to see what I was doing. I had shoots in the afternoon and an 11:00pm show at IO. He said "we're going to play in the set at SC". See, SC is Second City. They do an improv set after their shows and they let guests play sometimes. Tonight was my second time. The first time was with Deanna and I was nervous and boring. This time I was getting some good ones in there. It was fun and the cast is very, VERY nice about welcoming and thanking guests. Thanks SC!

From there we went to IO to see Bill Arnet's one man show (I think I spelled his last name wrong), and Meta Five before I did my Super Fun Times show. Super Fun Times is a group that just kind of got together to start doing shows in this 11:00 slot. I got invited two Sundays ago and played in the last three shows. And tonight, since Rich and Molly were there for Bill's show, we invited them to play with us. It was nice for them 'cause Molly is on Mainstage SC and her and Rich don't get to perform together as much as they used to.

EVERYONE WINS!

Killing Time

Eric Lindberg wrote about this and I feel compelled to as well. Last night we had a three hour rehearsal with a guy who started Poetry Slam in Chicago. He was talking to us because he was working with our artistic director to combine CSz and Poetry Slam...into PoetrySportz. I haven't been free on a night it has played, but I hear nothing but great things.

He is at our rehearsal to help wit our poetry based games. The first hour was all him talking about history, which left me instantly disconnected. I should start by saying that Spoken Poetry is one of my least favorite forms of "entertainment". It is sort of a bastard middle ground between poems on paper, and songs...both of which I like. I like writing poems, I like reading poems, but watching someone theatrically express their poem? Poison. It's good to see in order to represent it on a comedy stage...but not on a frequent basis.

To those who love it. Good. Great! That's why it's still around! You love it!

It just makes me cringe...and apparently, it makes me lose my train of thought. Bu-bye.

Days 12 & 13: Beloit, WI

My dad emailed me for the ending to this epic adventure. Apparently my life is Harry Potter-esque...except there's no magic or school or dead Dumbledore's (if you didn't know this, keep up...c'mon).

Not a super eventful ending to the adventure. Beloit, WI. I like to pronounce it "Bloit". It was far enough away that we needed to leave Wednesday night and shoot all day Thursday. The drive was not in a corporate jet...it was in Rich's car. Pretty standard...a few rounds of 21 questions.

It was snowing the day we left. Nothing major...minor accumulation. It was the kind of snow I like...you look outside, you see snow, that song from A Charlie Brown Christmas when they're ice skating starts playing in your head.

We get to Beloit. It is still kind of snowing...but it's 12 degrees. Twelve. Degrees. Ugh.

We wake up early the next morning and head over to the main office. We had to shoot our opener and closer of the whole piece. All of the other stuff we were shooting was the stuff that went in the middle. It took us until about 7:00. I was sooooo hungry by the time we were done. I was so hungry I felt like I was going to throw up. We stopped at some place...Ruby Tuesdays? Our server had a thick Wisconsin accent...so that was fun. We were pretty out of it from a long day. We got back and I was done.

The other three have one more shoot. Tomorrow as a matter of fact.

It was fun times. I may have a different gig in March for a different client, but no video stuff.

Oh, on the way home, Dumbledore died. The End.

Days 9-11 of 13 (+?): Texas

The Journey continues. This time we are missing our corporate Lear jet, as well as Sarah and Paul. We meet early at the airport to check our luggage and go through security...things that have been rendered foreign to us previously.

After the flight, we drive from the George Bush Airport in Houston to Stafford, TX. I've asked myself to pass the following message along to the State of Texas from my mouth, "Your roads and tolls suck!"

Oddly enough, with our track record of driving, we made it there without a single missed turn! AMAZING! We had one car this time, so Rich and I got to see the navigation chaos up close instead of just following and wondering what they are doing. Here is how it works. The director is driving. As I said earlier, I thought he was the problem, but we found out later it was the camerman, Rich. So Rich (the cameraman...I'll refer to Rich the actor by his self-given nickname, "Draggin'") sits shotgun and has the google map. He gets easily distracted by stuff outside or by his own stories. Dan the sound guy sits behind them with a handheld GPS system. GPS! He bought this because of how bad they are with directions. But, they still don't listen as much as they should. Regardless, we get to the hotel with zero problems.

After a meal and sleep we pack up to head to the branch of the store we're shooting for. It's Texas, and it's warm. I didn't sleep well because I'm coming down with a cold. The first shoot they want to set up doesn't require either of us...this ends up meaning a two hour nap in the van. Awesome. So the shoot didn't really start until 10:00am...but we would be hitting two locations during the day.

We finish at our first location and head to the second. Rich and I get to meet AJ Foyt, Jr...four time Indy 500 winner. We're shooting at his garage. There are about 9 indy cars in there...Rich got to sit in one! Neither of us are sports fans...and racing is somehow included in sports. We also meet his newest driver, Felipe Giaffone (I think that is his name). We're just happy to meet him...but it isn't a big deal to us. Later I find out Deanna told Rebecca H. about us meeting him and she flipped out and called her dad. He's big news.

Enter Black Friday. The weather went from warm to cold and windy really fast, and then we headed out to a new hotel closer to the airport. In comes the usual driving. I'll say we took five wrong turns, and I might be missing some. We kept turning too early...all the while, Dan was saying "we need to go down further according to the GPS". He was right.

We ate. Slept. And shot some stuff at the airport...then hoped on the Commercial flight home.

We have at least one day of driving to the last(?) location and one day of shooting. There may be one more thing after that, but I think next week's 1.5 days will be the end of this job.

It has been great.

PS. I'm watching The Colbert Report on Comedy Central right now and he has referred to Oregon as "California's Canada" for the second time now.